Rainy Days

Attended the Miss Tourism Preview yesterday night but shall blog about it later. I wish everyone was back in school instead. Why? Because my internet has become slower than an old man crossing a road and it's frustrating me no end. Can cry ok? Downloading has become virtually impossible since then!!!! Have no idea if it's my line or computer that has problem. Wish someone can tell me =(

Oh btw, HAPPY 18th BIRTHDAY ABI!!!! *hugs*

It's raining now.... I LOVE RAINY DAYS =D Just discovered that recently. But only on 2 conditions which is

1. NO thunderstorms involved
2. I am at home

Yes, I dislike thunderstorms immensely. Am deathly afraid if it, especially those that occur in the night. Afternoon ones I still can pretty much handle it but the night ones are the worst. It's HORRIBLE!!! I never believed that one can be petrified by thunderstorms to the point of being completely unable to move till it happened to me. Always left with 2 options which is to crawl deep into my blankets and pray endlessly that it'll end or make a mad dash for 2nd sis room but I'm always stuck with option 1 cause I'm too freakin afraid to even lift the darn covers first. Much less run.

I don't even know why I'm afraid of it. Just am. I just hate the sound, hate the scary lightning, hate the dead dead silence that can be heard in the midst of all that raging thunder (it's there I assure you. The weird silence. It's noisy with the storm but there is the sudden dead silence in it ) hate the weird shadows that suddenly appear, hate the thought that a blackout might occur. Everything seems 100000 times creepier ki. I kid you not. Cannot seem to get rid of this phobia no matter how many thunderstorm nights I've tried =(

Love rainy days still though =) Provided I am in the comfort of my home. During rainy days, your surroundings become quieter and take on a tranquil and almost ethereal atmosphere. Everyone becomes more sensitive or moody which means no energy to shout which mean golden silence =D Drinking hot teal or milo now has never been better. Curling up snugly in bed is also 10 times more enjoyable. The temperature is cool. EVERYTHING IS SO ABSOLUTELY PERFECT!!!!

The key thing is that I feel like I'm up at a resort in the mountains. Even my house itself feels very different on rainy days. I love it. Where I'm shut off from the hectic world and my family are able to stay together doing things together for those few precious magical hours totally uninterrupted. Like playing those 100 over but never touched board games in the little play corner of our house, sitting around the dining table munching my mom's freshly baked buns or pies and sipping hot tea, lounging around the living room talking about everything from childhood games to future jobs and marriage (lol) or just relax and listen to Jay Chou singing away on the Hi-Fi (All those slow Jay songs are like so lovely during rainy days!!! My family loves him lol), cramped into the tv room watching various movies together while fighting for the bags of chips (haha), all of us piled up on our parents bed chatting the night away etc.

It's times like these that makes me never want to leave. To always remain like this. One family all together. Knowing I won't be able to enjoy times like these when I attend college next year kinda hurts. That is the hardest to take of all. Even if I'm still with them then it won't be the same. After a year or so I won't be the girl I am now. In a few years I'll be an adult, no longer the little girl able to bounce crazily around the house whining about eating sushis to her daddy or screaming her idiotic head off when she catches a glimpse of NEWS on Animax. I never really thought about it until my daddy told me himself, which was partly why he made me stay back a year, just to spend more time with me and to let me take a long break to just have fun. I was really furious in the beginning but now I am extremely glad he did that. Happy that I had one year to just enjoy myself instead of rushing headlong into university right after SPM. Being able to break out of the mold made me see things some of my friends probably never got to see.

Growing up is hard. Separation is hard. Trying to remain the same is hard. I am so afraid I will screw up somewhere in university, knowing just how to easy it can be to make one wrong mistake and ruin my entire future. Hopefully all the endless advices and words of wisdom drilled into my head this year from my parents and various adults would stay in my head forever.

Sorry, rainy days tend to send me deep into thoughts and make me reflect on life a little more seriously. Anyway, I heart rainy days ♥~

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Heart rainy days even more now lol ^__^

**Yes, that IS Tegoshi and NOT some random girl. Prettier than you? LoL ♥